A Date with Me

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On the rare chance that I got to spend some alone time with him, I fell in love with my youngest son (DS).

We were en route to pick up the new househelp that same night the yaya left (Related Post: Top 10 Yaya Answers). Not having a capable someone to leave DS with, I brought him along. The husband was adamant about not leaving DS with him. No, not him! I’d rather watch over DA who’s much older, can walk, talk, and understand instructions.

I must admit that sometimes those are the same reasons why I choose to go out with the older one and not bring DS along. When I do get to spend time with DS however, the older one is always in tow (there seems to be an invisible magnet between us). With them together, there’s always someone crying, someone shouting, and someone getting stressed. I always end up leaving DS to the yaya just to keep my sanity in check and to actually get some things done.

Last night however, I was finally able to spend some quality time with DS. The husband was able to successfully bribe DA into staying at home while mommy and DS go on a trip to the South. There was heavy traffic on the way so we got to spend a lot of uninterrupted time together. We laughed, we played, we “sang”, we “talked”, we bonded. Not overshadowed by his older brother, I saw and was awed by his own smarts. I didn’t realize that he was also funny and full of character. I’ve always thought him to be serious and nonchalant.

He must have also realized that he has got mommy all to himself because he seemed so much happier, so much more confident, and much less fussy. My folks were keen on it too when we met up that night. Wow! What happened? He seems to be in such a good mood! He agreed to walk with my brother when he would otherwise just cling to me. He was also all smiles and all waves to everyone. Wowza!

DS was still in high spirits when we got home late that night. I couldn’t contain my happiness as well. Before falling asleep, an important realization dawned on me. The boys (and the grown man) actually want, nay, need my undivided time and attention to each of them separately. A date with me, if you must. While it may be necessary to do things together as a family, I reckon that it is equally essential to spend time alone with each of them – to talk to, to listen to, to get to know, to bond with, and to fall in love with each of them all over again.

Now if only there were three of me… 🙂

20 thoughts on “A Date with Me

  1. I often wonder how my mom divided her love to her 4 children equally. It seems so difficult. But just like what you’ve said, each child is a different person and must be given a chance to be known and loved. Giving them the time they need and deserve will not only let the parents get to know their children but it’s also an opportunity for the kids to be themselves or express themselves without apprehension because they know that they are loved even if he/she is different from his/her siblings. Thank you for sharing. 🙂

  2. So sweet. I also agree like Michi that you need to date your kids separately, per schedule I guess. Kita mo makikita mo talaga ang pagkakaiba nila. I will do it in the future, for the meantime I want to enjoy my day with my daughter ONLY with no Yaya and no Daddy. Hhhmmm.. But I guess it will be difficult for me kasi baby pa masyado si Rhian.

  3. It’s really different when we spend time as a family and when it’s only me and my son. Magkaibang happiness! Bukod sa mas nakikilala ko ang anak ko, kakachallenge din kapag kaming mag-ina lang ang magkasama. Paano ko siya ma-convince na maglakad dahil super bigat na niya kung kakargahin pa. Haha! I will forever treasure our train, jeepney rides together. Challenge ang tumayo sa train na may kargang super likot na bata! 🙂

  4. Wow! 3 boys! I love dates with my baby. I do that sometimes even if it’s hard and a little scary too. Her dad had no chance doing that yet because I’m too worried to let them. I think maybe it’s time the two go on date too.

  5. I totally agree with this! I once read from one of my mommy pegs that we, moms, must give time to each of our children separately. This way, we learn about each of them and bond with them. This makes them feel more loved.

  6. So sweet of you mommy. I have three children, ang problema kasi all of them toddlers pa kaya pag may sinama kang isa, kasama sila lahat 🙂 Pero pag mag -grocery ako kasama ko palagi baby girl namin kasi yun gusto ng daddy niya parang “me time”ko daw hehe. Pati sa salon pag may oras kasi only girl. Yun na ang pinaka-date namin. Nice to hear you’re catching up with you boys 🙂

    1. I understand the problem of pag isa sinama, sasama din yung iba! hehe. Same here. Pero buti yung eldest nabobola na ng daddy ngayon so paminsan pumapayag na hindi sumama sa akin hehe.

  7. We always have group dates – me, tatay and Skye. But I always make sure that I spend time with the baby at home. Kaya bilib ako sa Mama ko. Our age gap is at least 6yrs. Sabi nya para daw maalagaan kami ng husto while baby. Now it all makes sense. 🙂

    1. Ok nga din minsan pag bigger age gap ano, para may quality time kasi malaki na yung iba. Pag pare pareho kasing bata pa, lahat gusto sumama when you go out with 1 haha. 🙂

  8. You are so right about this mommy. All of them needs some exculsive time from us too. For us, it is kind of hard to do this because we don’t have a yaya. But we make it a point that we are all happy together. At least we have time as one family. 😀

  9. Awww. I miss my date with my eldest tuloy. Reminded me that I have to make time for our dates again. Siguro I’ll make bawi this Christmas. That’s what I love on reading mommy blogs. It reminds me the most important things that I tend to forget.

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